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[personal profile] clowkitty
Dear Count Dracula,

Please, don't take this the wrong way. It's not that I don't appreciate you for the fangie muse that you are -- and I admit you are quite respectably fearsome as the Vampire King. You are also creepily noble as the Lord of All Vampires. And no one, no one at all, can carry off wearing ruffles and lace as menacingly as you do.

All in all you are most gentlemanly, if a bit pushy about having your way at times, but that is to be expected when one compares our relative ranks.

However, I must rather insistently request that you forbear from poking into those files in my head that have no bearing at all on you, or your spheres of influence. It is most disconcerting when you do! My evidence of this disquiet you create is here:

'Twas the Night Before the Rising (A Visit from Dracula)

Twas the night before the Rising, when all through Castlevania
Many creatures were stirring -- complete Pandomania.
The weapons were hung on the wall with care,
In hopes that Dracula would soon would be there.

The Venus Weeds were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of blood-letting danced in their heads.
And Death in his shroud, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a century-long nap.

When out from the courtyard there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my crypt to see what was the matter.
Away to the entrance I flew like a bat,
Tore open the tomb and said, "Oh, no! Oh, drat!"

The moon on the breast of the sere, barren land
Gave the lustre of mid-day over the field of the damned.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But the castle of evil that brave men fear.

On the top of the clock tower dramatically stood my father,
I stamped into my boots thinking, "What a colossal bother!"
More rapid than eagles his castle rose up high,
While turreted claws ripped the moon from the sky.

"Now Chaos! Now, Evil! Now, Mayhem and Despair!
On, Rancor! On, Hatred! On Malice and Nightmare!
To the top of the portcullis! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.
So over the unsuspecting towns the coursers they flew,
With their souls full of mayhem, and Dracula's bidding too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on my roof
The prancing and pawing of each cloven hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
In the crypt entrance Dracula came with a bound.

He was dressed all in ruffles, from his head to his feet
And his cloak was all aflutter (the effect
was neat).
His smile was full of cunning, danger and guile
He seemed to judge me as he stared for a while.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his fangs how they gleamed!
Though he smiled quite broadly, it was not as it seemed.
Like ominous thunder his joyous laugh rang out
A hoard of waiting monsters gave voice to a shout.

The hilt of a sword he held tight in his hand,
Around my quiet crypt his doom-filled gaze scanned.
He had watchful eyes and a sharply judging manner,
I'm my father's son I admit with rueful candor.

He was awesome and lean, not at all like an elf,
And I shook when I saw him, in spite of myself!
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had everything to dread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
His castle stopped rising with a sudden jerk.
His sneer challenged me, the gauntlet was thrown,
To enter his castle and bring him to moan.

He sprang into the air, to his team gave a howl,
And as bats they flew to his castle with a yowl.
But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he flew out of sight,
"Castlevania has risen, son, join me there tonight!"

I hope you understand my bafflement and restrain yourself in the future. Sir. If you could see your way to be so kind, that is. *sweatdrop*

Most sincerely,


PS - Please allow me to disabuse you of the notion of dressing as Santa Claus. I shudder to imagine how such a garish outfit would clash with and overwhelm your more subtle coloring. (And I'm way more scared of Santa Claus than I ever was of you!) :P


Date: 2004-12-02 05:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Bwahahahah!!!! *snerk* Gad, I love your

Date: 2004-12-02 05:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Stupid LJ! As I was saying, ahem, "I love your fangy muse."

::grumbles about premature posting::

*giggles like mad*

Date: 2004-12-03 07:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
So do we all agree that he should make kitt do things... I mean, er, 'visit' kitt more often? *grin* ^___^

Oh and uhm... am I the only one who recited the rhyme the conventional way just to see which words got substituted for my favorite reindeer? hehehehe

Re: *giggles like mad*

Date: 2004-12-03 07:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

Evil Vampapa! He's just being a complete narcissist, wanting me to insert him into every story!

What should one do when one's muse is the ultimate Mary Sue?


Date: 2004-12-03 03:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Erm. . . why does the last line in the second to last stanza make me think perverted little thoughts? Bwahaha!! ^_~

You probably shouldn't try to silence a muse with so many weapons at his disposal. ^_^;

Date: 2004-12-03 04:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

No icky thoughts 'bout 'Card and his dad!

'Card and his brother on the other (Left) hand...

Ah! What am I saying?! No, no! Bad thought! Bad thought!

>.You probably shouldn't try to silence a muse with so many weapons at his disposal. ^_^;

Naw...Himself would never hurt me. Who would write all about his wonderful exploits if I were gone? ^_~

Besides, if he gets too far out of hand (no, not you, you icky parasite!) I 'm sure Suzaku wouldn't mind bringing him back into line. Or perhaps Maahes? (Too many muses!)


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December 2004

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